Notice to all my Facebook connections:
This is *Un-friend Deborah Week. If for whatever reason you would like to eliminate me from your feed, this is your chance for a free pass. I’ll be totally cool with it. Won’t hurt my feelings. I promise.
I’m sure some of you friended me because you didn’t know my posts would be so boring. Maybe you’re just not interested in my incessant drival about food and travel. Or you feel my posts are too frequent, or not frequent enough. Or perhaps they are without socially redeeming content and you have much better things to do with your time. By all means, click that “x” next to my name. I won’t be offended.
Some of you, when first setting up your facebook, rushed out and friended everyone you could think of. You operated under the Facebook-encouraged misconception that it was about the quantity of connections. Having triple digit friend numbers was some sort of ultimate goal. Now you are rethinking and have decided that quality is more desirable. You want to do a little house cleaning. I’m OK with being one of the people you sweep out.
Even though you may not have wanted to, some of you might have responded to my friend request out of fear that you would hurt my feelings if you didn’t accept. I have a thick skin. Please feel free to unfriend.
If you do, un-friend me, I promise to pretend like I didn’t notice. No awkward emails asking why. No telephone calls begging you to reconsider. No pregnant silences when we see each other in person. It will be as if we never shared the grip of a facebook connection at all.
Of course, I also realize that long ago, some of you may have hidden my posts from your feed. That’s the passive way of dealing with a problem without dealing with it. I understand. I’ve hidden a few myself. Unfortunately for you, you won’t see this offer. You won’t know you have the option. Sorry.
*(fine print) This offer is good until Saturday, October 24th. Then we go back to psychological trama business as usual. This offer is exclusive of all relatives-no matter how distantly related we are.